Why Do I Feel So . . . Settled?

We all love to feel settled, safe, and complete inside. Maybe you feel that way because you have a lot of holy soul ties.

Remember, they are called holy because they mesh with the pattern originated by God. Let’s discuss ways they can be formed.

  • One common holy (or Godly) soul tie occurs with marriage and the joining of bodies and souls under that covenant. The marriage covenant was ordained by God (“the two shall become one”).

The word covenant is very important to remember. It goes further than a contract and it’s more than a legal document. A covenant is a solemn vow. In its original form it meant pledging your life, goods, and strength to someone else. This is sounding more and more like the wedding vows, isn’t it?


  • Another common soul tie is developed with good friends. Soul-deep friendships, such as that of David and Jonathon in the Old Testament (I Sam 18:1-5) and Paul and Barnabas in the New Testament (Acts 15:40-41, 16:25-26) are Biblical examples of holy soul ties. I’m certain you can point to at least one person who fits this description in your life.

as friendships grow, so grow the soul ties

Sometimes the tie forms right away. Other times it develops more slowly. I don’t know about you, but some of my closest friendships are the ones that started with a distance that disappeared gradually. The time element has very little to do with the strength of the soul tie.


  • Family “ties” aren’t called that for no reason—they are indeed soul ties. They are developed through that close contact with family members, even when it isn’t a physical closeness. We hear about cases of siblings who were separated shortly after birth and yet still feel that connection on a soul level, remembering nothing about the other person. A child whose twin died in the womb can feel incomplete due to that soul tie.

During my medical training, I saw the way mothers reacted to their brand-new babies. It was a beautiful, strong and holy soul tie.

a powerful holy soul tie forms at birth No doubt in my mind.




I think it all began in the Garden of Eden. God said it was not good for the man to be alone. I’m sure Adam formed a holy soul tie with Eve from the very beginning. After all, his first declaration when he saw her was one of recognition—

 entering into the covenant of marriage begins the formation of a strong holy soul tie“Bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.”

And her original name—what Adam, or Ish, originally called her—wasn’t Eve (“mother of my children”). It was Isha, roughly translated as “me, only better.”



Holy soul ties are joyous and beneficial and are a major reason why we feel close to people.

We even have the capability of having holy soul ties with God. How cool is that? The creator of the universe wants to have holy soul ties with us!


Coming up in part 3: unholy soul ties

part 2 of a 4 part series on soul ties

Part 1| Blessed Be the (Soul) Ties that Bind . . . or Not

Part 2| Why Do I Feel So Settled?

Part 3 Why Do I Feel So Scattered?

Part 4| How Can I Fix This Scattered Feeling?

All illustrations courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net