Lonely in a Crowd

image of anonymous humanoidsHave you ever gone to a party and felt alone? Have you been alone in a crowd while shopping?

Did either situation make you feel lonely?

I really don’t much like shopping, but I rather enjoy shopping with my sister or my mom or a friend. It helps to have someone to share ideas with. Someone who can say, “You really shouldn’t wear that color,” or “That outfit looks awesome on you.” When I can’t find something, I appreciate someone else looking for it or suggesting something else appropriate. And I’m really thankful when they find a great bargain for me, especially when we’re Christmas shopping.

Even when I shop alone, I rarely feel lonely. I wonder why? Is it because I have a task to perform? Maybe it’s because I am preoccupied with thinking instead of feeling.

family togetherLoneliness does hit occasionally in that situation. It can happen when I see an intact family or happy couple interacting and I allow myself to mentally transfer their happiness to my own life: Why hasn’t God seen fit to give me a husband and family that enjoy me like that?

What refuses to come to mind is reality: they aren’t always happy (nobody is), they don’t always get along (nobody does), or they might actually be miserable at home (and hiding it in public).

Loneliness in a crowd can come from envy or dissatisfaction with your life at the time. I believe it comes under the category of covetousness. Remember the 10th Commandment? God gave the commandment for many reasons, but avoiding jealousy can certainly help us avoid loneliness.

The same principle applies when we feel lonely at a party or social gathering. We concentrate on how alone we feel and we convince ourselves that others are having a good time while we aren’t. We allow ourselves to think, “Look at them. So-and-so certainly likes her better than me.”frustrated woman

Maybe it’s true, maybe not. But lies live in the darkness, and bringing them into the light dissipates them.

Jealousy is a big part of loneliness. And jealously is rooted in insecurity.

It’s an issue of identity and of relationship.

this is part 3 of a series on loneliness

Part1|One is the Loneliest Number

Part 2|Alone Does Not Equal Lonely

Part 3|Lonely in a Crowd

Part 4|Unloved and Lonely

Part 5|Lonely in our Selfishness

Part 6|Love Fights Loneliness

Part 7|Love is Laying Down Your Soul

Part 8| Misunderstanding “Laying Down Your Soul”

Part 9| Unknown and Lonely

Part 10| Lonely in a Good Marriage

all illustrations courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net